and roll
sex, drugs rock and roll,
these are the things you can control.
no longer will you control me or make me feel one way and say another. talking shit behind my back? “ya, sal is at some hooka bar?” “who the fuck smokes hooka?” i know everything. i understand everything. i will never doubt myself again. never again will i give another the benefit of the doubt. never again will i give another second chance. never again will i feel bad for not giving you everything i deserve to be given.
lassy
good lookin out bro.
babysit in the hours to come. fml
cant
cant help myself? help someone who i know DESRVES IT. until i think i deserve. i know i do.
because
they want me to want to do it for myself. today i hate everything about myself, again. i feel so frustrated. i hate anything artistic i try to do.
“Like the ebb and flow of the tides, you are both receptive to those you love and willing to offer comfort in return.”
“Like the ebb and flow of the tides, feelings can sometimes make us feel cast adrift through inner space.”
“Cancer reflects the ebb and flow of the tides - and, as such, reflects the ebb and flow of emotions. This varying (ebb and flow) moods of “wild child.”“
“As long as the ebb and flow are kept in some kind of balance, this sign tends to function positively. “
…and i can’t argue one bit.
maybe ill try to DO something today.
helpless romantic.
hope
i dont know what to write. i want to say. i want to say everything and never forget how i feel right now. i want to say at everyone who will sit and pretend to listen. reading other peoples thoughts make me hate my own. my own style, vocabulary, verse, my own everything.
other people read books about things and well known pieces of art and literature, i dont know anything well known. am i less smart?
am i less smart.
am i five.
fuckinchrist, no wonder i hate fighting, i keep talking.
so frustrated.
every word is a battle of my brain against the keyboard. what do i feel?
nothing
empty
hate
i fucking hate you! i hate that you turned something good bad! i hate that you dont act like my best friend! i hate that you dont act like my friend. i hate that i gave you and ultimatum. i hate that you picked the choice i wouldnt. why cant it work now? i know why, but i dont want to wait. since when is being TOO GOOD a reason for you NOT to get something. shouldnt i get everything i want if im too good?
the only time you hurt me was when you were trying not to. i dont need you to censor you life, i just want to know. i dont fucking care if youre having threesomes everyday, as long as i know and im okay. just dont lie. just love me. i know you do. i know it. or something.
I want the money,
Money and the cars,
Cars and the clothes,
The hoes,
I suppose,
I just wanna be,
with you.
so i DONT want the money, i dont NEED the money and the cars and clothes and hoes. i NEED you. i just let a hug. i just need to be called gorgues NOT right before you go down. i just need to feel like you… I JUST NEED YOU WITH ME NOW.
i could list a million things wrong with you.
you’re fat, jobless, need new shoes.
but im still here to talk with you, be waiting in the truck
i could list a million things wrong with you.
you make yourself laugh, abrasive,
what can i do
to make you see, you are wonderful
you go with me.
i want all of your time, make you mine while you’re just sitting there
a crime, me with out you.
fuckinniggershit. sorry pres obama? where’d you find all that money for hati anyway?
all i want is a cigarette. misery loves its company, misery invited jealousy.
why couldnt it just be costco?
babblebabblecheck!missingcheck!babblebabble
Pick up after Your DOg.
“i knew it wasnt cramps. i knew it. ive felt those types of cramps before. duece time. but we didnt know that.
“no! no! no! jean! i cant move! i cant think, this is terrble.”
“well, do you want to stay here or go to the beach house? do you want to go to your dads? we can forget about kenton.”
well im FUCKIN pissed. of course i feel compassion, but i hate being stuck at home in my dirty room. i want to leave. if i can just get her off my bed and to the car, we’re home free.
Or so i thought.
finally out of the house but now shes crampin up again. THE HELL! when will the pain go away.
“i’m not hurting myself! i just want to feel pain NOT in my stomach.”
motherfuckinjesuschrist. she has the scissors to her hand trying to escape the pain. just another jenny day i guess.
Or so i thought.
“jean, i gotta go RIGHT NOW!”
she wants to go to the nest.
Or so i thought.
“no! no! turn off the car, im going right here! im going to SHIT outside of your truck.”
“my house is RIGHT THERE jenny, go inside, my parents wont care.”
Too late. The door whizzes open, zip, squat and at that moment, i heard what i can never unhear. i heard shit hit cement. i heard shit hit cement!! no one can or will understand the irreversable feeling after one has heard shit hit cement. she then weeble wobbles over six inches.
AGIAN another literal shit storm torpedoes out of her anus.
the only thing i can do at this point is laugh. until it hits me like a sac of potatoes. the smell. THE HORRID, rancid, smell of OLD poo.
“STOP! STOP! jenny it smells like dog shit! we have to go NOW.”
“no! no dude! i need wipeage.”
this cant be happening, dear GOD i cant breath. okay a napkin, not enough? crazy shitting bitch, why are you my friend. and a reciept. good luck. i cant believe it, smells like someone stepped in dog poo.
“here, here is wipe-age, we are LEAVING.”
…its finally over.
Or so i thought.
“i left two turds of tamagotchi poo! two little piles of poo!”
hilarious. caddingtion, western, pv drive north, i cant stop laughing! what a ridiculous turn of events, im so glad she’s all…
“FIND SOMEWHERE TO PULL OVER!”
no. no this again.
“pull over or i will shit my pants!”
very funny jenny. false alarm.
Or so i thought.
i turn off into a familiar neighborhood; mary’s. i find grass, she jumps out, crouches behind a tree, and does her business, again.
jenny, you dirty bitch.”
Page 1 of 2
